Adolf

Here is a small A4 painting of a curious cat with an unfortunate tuft of black fur under his nose. It was based on a photograph which I can't remember taking it. Once I was walking through Haworth and a cat with distinctive black moustache was on a low shed roof and peering down at me. Resisting my coaxing I turned away and was surprised when it leapt onto my shoulders. Once I saw a cat imprisoned in a telephone box and it darted out once I opened the door. I hope I've had a day added onto my life for that good deed.

This small painting progressed without problems though the quality is in line with the short time it took to complete. I don't suppose you can spend too much time on a stretch of canvas measuring 30cm x 21cm can you? I pencilled in the general shapes of Adolf and the stone wall and got started with oils and a thin brush. Before I knew it I was tickling in the grass and it was finished. I've read in trivia books that when Hitler was in power it was illegal in Germany to call your dog Adolf. It sounds like one of those myths doesn't it? Hitler was given a German Shepherd puppy called Blondi but he killed it with cyanide minutes before killing himself. As the Soviet army closed in on his bunker he decided to end his life. He didn't trust the cyanide pills given to him by Himmler and decided to try one on Blondi (it worked.)

This one can be yours for £2880. I know you have the money as when I was last in your bedroom I did a nude handstand in front of that full-length mirror. I collapsed in a heap and while lying on the carpet I saw an envelope taped to the underside of your bedside cabinet. There was £3,000 in cash in it. I can mail Adolf off to you tomorrow.