Sometimes
when I'm painting I need a little diversion so I go onto Youtube
and watch compilations of drunk people falling over. They fall into bushes,
roads, bins, holes, ponds and ditches in near slow motion. I don't like beer
and have never been drunk so I'm not sure what it's like. I couldn't recall
painting a drunk person and thought it was time I did one. Here it is.
As a lad on holiday at a Butlin's holiday
camp I remember walking back to the chalet one evening and seeing a drunk man. He
was probably the first drunk person I'd seen and I was a bit mesmerised. At one
point he got down onto his knees and crawled along a path like a baby. When he
reached a post he stood up and clung to it. He seemed to be concentrating hard on
the metal post and clinching on as though he was on a boat rocking violently in
rough seas.
Anyway I've painted the man from memory on a small canvas in oils. There
aren't many details here to get wrong so I completed it quite quickly without
conflicts. I made up the windows in the background. A nice British Bulldog I
thought for that window on the right (note its ball.) Jackdaws are probably my
favourite birds so I put one on the street sign looking down at the drunk man.
I wasn't sure what to put on the street sign but an AA for alcoholic Anonymous
felt apt. Perhaps you know a rampant boozer who'd like this for their birthday.
Surely you have £6,882 in cash hidden under a roll of insulation in your attic
or behind that 1988 tin of sardines in the back of your cupboard?